Unit 7: Communication Skills
The Importance of Listening
Listening is the most under-emphasized part of the communication cycle, yet it is the basis of effective communication. The failure to listen results in needless misunderstanding, errors, and problems.
Listening means more than just hearing. Hearing is merely the physical reception of a sound and an automatic reaction of the senses. In order to listen, we make a conscious effort to hear sounds and messages. For example, city people may not “hear” the screeching of brakes and the passing of trains; because they have become so accustomed to these sounds, they no longer pay attention to them. Therefore, listening is actually an active process in which we filter and interpret what we hear.
Why is it an active process? Usually people speak about 125 words per minute, but we can listen at a rate of about 400 words per minute. The free “input time” that the brain has for listening is often spent daydreaming, being critical, or focusing on other issues. This causes us to miss incoming information.
Furthermore, we often listen for the wrong things and attempt to meet our needs as listeners, while ignoring the needs of the person who is speaking to us.
There are certain responsibilities that listeners must assume in the communication process. We must:
• Want to listen,
• Focus our attention on what the speaker is saying,
• Recognize that the sender is personalizing his or her message, and that we are
personalizing and interpreting these messages as they are received, and
• Accept that listening requires the use of learned skills.
Roadblocks to Effective Listening
There are many reasons why listening is a difficult skill to master. Some roadblocks to listening are related to external factors, such as environmental interference (e.g., noise, extreme heat, or cold) and inappropriate location (e.g., “correcting” another person’s performance in the lounge where coworkers are present).
Most roadblocks, however, are internal. They include a variety of conditions or reactions present within the listener, including:
• Emotional interference.
Example: If a receiver is upset or tired, he or she may block or redirect a message.
• Defensiveness.
Example: Worker who interprets, “Your report was late,” to mean, “You are an incompetent person.” Defensiveness results from messages that threaten the receiver’s ego and sense of worth.
• Failure to listen for feelings as well as for facts and ideas.
Example: A law enforcement officer who says, “I can’t complete this assignment by next week,” may mean : It is beyond my ability to do this work, or, I have an overburdened workload, or I have insufficient data to complete the task. Assessing the speaker’s feelings will facilitate an accurate interpretation of the message.
• Failure to solicit clarification.
Example: An F.B.1. Agent who thinks to himself, “If! ask my supervisor what he wants me to do, he will think I’m stupid,” will never get a clear picture of what the supervisor wants the Agent to do. Then the Agent may well be perceived as stupid.
• Hearing what is expected rather than what is said.
Example: A police who begins to defend his position before he realizes that the other person agrees with him.
• Stereotyping.
Example: A Customs Agent who thinks, “That supervisor is really going to be pushy. What can I expect? He’s from New York; all New Yorkers are overly aggressive,” will hear what he or she expects to hear from an “aggressive New Yorker,” not necessarily what is actually said.
• Halo effect.
Example: A police officer who says, “My sergeant really watches out for me so ifhe says that’s the way to handle this, believe me, that’s the right approach”; the police officer may not really be listening to a description of the approach because he or she believes everything the sergeant says is good and correct.
• Reference groups and frame of reference.
Example: The detective who says after the meeting, “That new procedure sounds great for the people in traffic, but it’s sure going to mean a lot of extra work for our unit,” has probably closed off to the communication because he or she thinks the idea has no relevance for his or her own group.
• Resistance to change.
Example: A patrolman who believes, “That’s the way we’ve done it for ten years. Why upset the apple cart now?” will be reluctant to really listen to a good new idea.
• Resistance to the over-communicator.
Example: A lab technician who believes his or her coworker talks incessantly or generates unnecessary paperwork will be less likely to really listen to the coworker.
One can overcome these roadblocks to effective communication by recognizing that not every situation requires the same kind of listening behavior, but all of them require openness and empathy.